An example of patience

The following post is written by Jill Williams a mother of two beautiful princesses and a handsome prince and they all have smiles that will melt your heart.  She and Charlotte have spent many hours running together in preparation for one race or another.  Jill is also the organizer of the 5k and 1 mile Fun Run which will be held October 15th in Cache Valley.

Tonight I stopped by Charlotte's house to drop off some dinner. I found her sitting at the kitchen counter with her youngest son, helping him with homework. He looked frustrated. I know she has a cold right now, and she looked tired. But patient. That's one thing about Charlotte that's always impressed me. She is so patient. She never lets things rattle her.

I've witnessed her boys climbing like monkeys all over the playground, making me bite my nails with nervousness as I worry they may fall. Charlotte keeps her cool, and assures me boys will be boys and I will soon see now that I have my own little baby boy.

I've seen Charlotte at 4:30 am as we boarded a bus the morning of the Bear Lake Marathon. I had been training for it for 6 months, and was anxious about the miles ahead, worrying over the weather, if I was overdressed, if I was underdressed (I would have been if Charlotte hadn't let me borrow an extra jacket she had brought along, just in case), if I had enough water in my water belt to last me between aid stations, if I was trained enough, and many other things. Charlotte had been training for the half marathon, but since it was filled up decided to sign up for the marathon instead. Although she hadn't been training for it, she kept her cool, knowing she could finish, and just her presence calmed my nerves.

Now I've seen my dear friend Charlotte learn she has cancer, calmly explain her situation to medical personnel over and over again, humbly accept meals and financial assistance from friends, family, and strangers, and continue to uplift everyone with her beautiful smile and sweet spirit. And she patiently waits to discover what the Lord has planned for her, trusting him with infinite faithfulness. I am so thankful to have Charlotte as such an example of patience in my life.

Why I am helping with Lottes of Love

This guest post is written by Cynthia Mikesell. She is a mother of 3 boys, two of whom attend Thomas Edison Charter School where Charlotte taught before her diagnosis. She has a degree in Educational Interpreting for the Deaf and has worked in that field for over 10 years. Currently she is a stay at home mom who is dedicating herself to helping with the organization of events for Lottes of Love.

 

I've been thinking of the post Charlotte wrote last week about her experiences at the Cancer Treatment Center while receiving radiation and chemotherapy treatments.  Then this morning while I was doing some housework with the radio blaring there were two separate songs played in the time it took me to clean the bathroom that were about receiving a cancer diagnosis and living every moment like it was your last.  And I realized that being diagnosed with cancer is becoming so prevalent in our society that most of us know at least 1 person who either has just received a diagnosis, is fighting it or is in remission.  I know that I can think of over a dozen friends, neighbors, teachers, or family members who are either fighting or have lost their battle with cancer.  I'm sure you can too. . .  That's when I start to feel overwhelmed.  

Cancer is big. Cancer is scary.  When I start to focus on how big and how scary it is I start to feel helpless.  Nothing I can do will heal the bodies of any of the individuals Char has met at her treatments or the people the music stars are singing about.  That thought both frightens and saddens me.  So what can I do?

I've started to feel that giving to some foundation who is doing research is all well and good and maybe the easy way out to feel like I'm doing something or have done something. In the past I've supported the American Cancer Society, the Pink Ribbon Campaign, and the Huntsman Cancer Center.  But I've learned through Charlotte's journey that most of those foundations aren't really designed to help those who are diagnosed. They are researching and doing clinical trials but the patients still have to find a way to pay the astronomical costs associated with the experimental medications. Which makes me start to feel helpless again. When I give to the big research foundations most of my money is going to researchers and scientists. 

I agree that what they are doing is important work. It is necessary work. I hope and pray that one day they find a cure. However, more must be done to care for financial needs of  those who suffer from this devastating disease now. To get the treatment they need as early after diagnosis as possible. The science and technology exists to save a lot of lives, but the access to it is guarded by massive expenses that many (especially those without medical insurance) simply do not have the resources to overcome on their own. Had Charlotte been able to have surgery within a few weeks of her diagnosis, before the cancer began to spread to her lymphatic system, her chances to beat this disease would have significantly increased and the treatment needed to save her life would have been less complex. I don’t have statistics on how many people won’t survive their fight against cancer because they lack the monetary resources to get the treatment that could very well save their lives. But that number should be zero.

Don’t stop donating to cancer research foundations—they do important work! But next time you hear that someone has been diagnosed with cancer, remember that they will likely need much more than your prayers and well wishes to beat it. Their successful fight against cancer may require your time, talents and whatever funds you can give. I can't fix Cancer. I can't make a difference in the lives of everyone diagnosed with cancer who lives in Cache Valley. For today I want to be able to help someone, just one person in a way that makes a difference in their battle against cancer. For me that person is Charlotte.

I remember the day we met.....

The following is a guest post written by Karen Kelly. She is a mother of five beautiful children and has been instrumental in the organization of benefit events for Lotte's of Love, including making many of the yummy treats at the bake sale table during the Yard Sale we held in early July.

I remember the day we met.....

Photo by Karen Kelly

My husband and I and our three kids had just moved into a Blackhawk Condo. Boxes were everywhere. We knew no one. There was a knock at the door one afternoon. I was confused at who it could be. I opened the door to a woman about my age. She apologized for bothering me and said they had just returned from camping and she was wondering if I had some milk she could borrow for her 18 month old little boy. She told me they lived just through the parking lot from us. She told me her name was Charlotte. And we have been friends ever since.

She has been there for me in every aspect of my life. When I feel my world is crashing down around me. Her arms are there to hold me up. When great things come about for myself or my family, her smile is there to cheer me on. We are often asked if we are sisters and I want to wrap my arms around her and yell, "Yes!" because she is that close to my heart.

Charlotte is strong. Strong body. Strong and clear mind. Strong values. Strong feelings for what she is passionate about. Strong in the face of adversity, from many angles. Strong, raw love for her family, especially her two young sons. Strong faith. When I am with her I pull from her strength. Whether we are playing at the park or on a late night shopping trip. She makes me strive to be better, hold on for longer and trust that the Lord will pick up the rest. I find peace in her testimony and love listening to her speak of the things she knows are true.

I can't believe she has cancer. I just can't grasp it. Not Charlotte!! When I look at her I think, "No. Please, no." I am still in denial some days. Then she talks of the treatments she will need and the side effects and I am sick to my stomach. A quiet acceptance comes over me. And I know it is real. She does have cancer. It's very serious. I could lose her. And I don't think I can handle that right now. Not ever. We are supposed to grow old together and go on Cruises when we are in our sixties. (Well, not a Cruise. We both get motion sickness.) But a mountain retreat somewhere.......

All my love and sincerity,

Karen

The beginnings of Lotte's of Love

Photo by Keri Andersen and used with permission

So if you've found your way to this blog you may be wondering what exactly is Lotte's of Love and how did it come into existence.  It all started in early May 2011 when I received a letter with a handcrafted friendship bracelet from a friend of mine.  Her letter says it better than I ever could.

Hi friend!

We all love and know Charlotte super well.  We all know that she is a strong, special and faithful woman.  When I heard from her that she has cancer, I was shocked, but it didn't sink in for awhile.  She was playing it so cool.  After going home and pondering it, I wanted to do something to show that I cared and supported her 510%.  I thought of making these bracelets to wear.  Though simple, I thought it was a perfect opportunity to involve some of her closest friends too.  That's why you're getting one!  I hope you can support Charlotte by wearing this until she has had her surgery and she is "all clear" from the cancer.  I learned and interesting thing about friendship bracelets (or BFF Bracelet" according to Danny).  Part of the reason they call them that is because they are extremely difficult to put on yourself...you need a friend to help you.  I thought this was perfect.  Charlotte needs her friends to help her through this difficult time.  I hope you choose to wear it!

Lots of Love, Brenda

PS.  White and teal are the colors for cervical cancer.  I used silver instead of white (thanks Karen for the fab idea), and the black just looks cool.

So initially this small group of Charlotte's closest friends started wearing the friendship bracelets that Brenda had crafted with love and sent to each of us, we took pictures of us wearing our bracelets and posted them as our Facebook Profile Pictures.  We loved on Charlotte and supported her.  We knew she was juggling medical stuff but didn't want to pry or get in her business.

Before long we all realized that the monetary commitment her uninsured family was going to have to come up with just in order to get the hospital to schedule the surgery she needed was really beyond their resources.  Not to mention the toll the added stress of trying to handle all the phone calls and paperwork was taking on her health.  So for our love of Charlotte we started to put plans into place to help with the financial needs.  Thus with some phone calls and conversations we all pooled our talents together and Lotte's of Love became a reality.

We can't lose her!  Please help us get our dear friend the medical treatments she needs to save her life.

Cynthia

The story of Charlotte's cancer of course all begins months before that right before a St.. Patrick's party and a much anticipated Girls' Night Out.  

to be continued. . . .